{"id":4790,"date":"2020-07-29T11:28:28","date_gmt":"2020-07-29T11:28:28","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/?p=4790\/"},"modified":"2020-11-06T17:21:12","modified_gmt":"2020-11-06T17:21:12","slug":"en-kotu-karar-kararsizliktan-iyidir","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/en-kotu-karar-kararsizliktan-iyidir\/","title":{"rendered":"En K\u00f6t\u00fc Karar Karars\u0131zl\u0131ktan \u0130yidir"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>(Yazar\u0131 sesli dinlemek i\u00e7in t\u0131klay\u0131n.)<br \/>\n<audio class=\"wp-audio-shortcode\" id=\"audio-4790-1\" preload=\"none\" style=\"width: 100%;\" controls=\"controls\"><source type=\"audio\/mpeg\" src=\"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/10-En-kotu-karar-karasizliktan-iyidir.m4a?_=1\" \/><a href=\"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/10-En-kotu-karar-karasizliktan-iyidir.m4a\">https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/10-En-kotu-karar-karasizliktan-iyidir.m4a<\/a><\/audio><\/p>\n<p>Ge\u00e7en yaz\u0131mda, \u0130stanbul\u2019a u\u00e7ma konusundaki kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n dayan\u0131lmaz \u201chafifli\u011fini\u201d kaleme alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m. Her ne olursa olsun, er ya da ge\u00e7 u\u00e7may\u0131 kafaya koyu\u015fumuzun hikayesiydi. \u015eansl\u0131yd\u0131k&#8230; kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n ve niyet etmenin m\u00fcthi\u015f itici g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u00fc arkam\u0131za alarak yol ald\u0131k&#8230; Bir yandan, belirsizlik i\u00e7inde yerimizde sayd\u0131k; di\u011fer yandan, kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z sayesinde \u015fartlar lehimize i\u015fledi ve sa\u011f salim murad\u0131m\u0131za erdik. Geriye do\u011fru bak\u0131yorum da&#8230; diyebilirim ki, belki de \u015fans\u0131m\u0131z istedi\u011fimizi bilme ve o y\u00f6nde g\u00f6sterdi\u011fimiz kararl\u0131l\u0131kt\u0131. Ne yaz\u0131k ki, belirsizli\u011fin hakim oldu\u011fu \u015fu d\u00f6nemde b\u00f6ylesine cesur ve kararl\u0131 olmak pek de kolay de\u011fil. Bir \u00e7ok yak\u0131n\u0131m m\u00fcthi\u015f karars\u0131zl\u0131k i\u00e7inde, kalsam m\u0131 gitsem mi (\u201cshould I stay or should I go?!\u201d) ikilemi ya\u015f\u0131yor&#8230; Genelde karars\u0131zl\u0131\u011fa kolayca d\u00fc\u015febilen yap\u0131mdan olsa gerek, belirsizli\u011fin yaratt\u0131\u011f\u0131 \u015fu \u201ckarars\u0131zl\u0131k\u201d olgusunu analiz etmeye koyuldum. <\/p>\n<p>\u00d6ncelikle, Covid-19 vakalar\u0131 halen devam ederken, b\u00f6lgesel k\u0131s\u0131tlamalar yeniden g\u00fcndemdeyken, ve belirsizlik halen hakimiyetini s\u00fcrerken, seyahat etmeye kalk\u0131\u015fmak ne kadar do\u011fru, tart\u0131\u015f\u0131l\u0131r! Karantinaya yakaland\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z yerde kalmay\u0131 se\u00e7ti\u011fimiz ve alternatiflerin pe\u015finden gitmekten vazge\u00e7ti\u011fimiz gibi, belki de yeni normalin i\u00e7inden ge\u00e7erken oldu\u011fumuz yerde kalmay\u0131 se\u00e7meliyiz. Ancak, yaz mevsimi, tatil ihtiyac\u0131, hatta al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar\u0131n getirdi\u011fi d\u00fcrt\u00fcler ile k\u0131pra\u015fma, hareketlenme ve yer de\u011fi\u015ftirme arzusuna giriyoruz. Hele ki, \u00e7evremizden birilerin yazl\u0131klar\u0131na, tatil yerlerine gidi\u015fini g\u00f6rd\u00fck\u00e7e, i\u00e7imizdeki mini k\u0131p\u0131rt\u0131lar b\u00fcy\u00fck hareketlenmelere d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor. Bedenimiz \u201ckalk gidiyoruz!\u201d diyor; zihnimiz \u201cdur hele; nereye, nas\u0131l, hangi ko\u015fullarda, ya bir \u015fey olursa&#8230;\u201d ile bizi adeta koltu\u011fa m\u0131hl\u0131yor. \u0130\u015fte as\u0131l k\u0131yamet bundan sonra kopuyor&#8230; Mant\u0131k ile duygular aras\u0131nda ezeli sava\u015f ba\u015fl\u0131yor! <\/p>\n<p>Soruyorum, ka\u00e7\u0131n\u0131z, \u015fu son bir ka\u00e7 ay i\u00e7inde, k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck veya b\u00fcy\u00fck \u00f6l\u00e7ekte, bir karar alma \u00e7abas\u0131yla bu sava\u015f\u0131 ya\u015fad\u0131n\u0131z? Kuaf\u00f6re\/berbere giderken mesela; k\u00f6\u015fedeki kafede arkada\u015f\u0131n\u0131zla bir kahve i\u00e7meye yeltenirken; a\u00e7\u0131k havada bir restoranda yemek yeme plan\u0131 yaparken; u\u00e7a\u011fa binip seyahate gitmeye yeltenirken&#8230;. veya, yak\u0131nlar\u0131n\u0131z\u0131 g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcn\u00fczde bedeninizin sar\u0131lma g\u00fcd\u00fcs\u00fcyle at\u0131l\u0131rken! Hedef ne olursa olsun, eminim ki duygu ve beden \u201chadi\u201d diyorken, zihin \u201cbir daha d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u201d ile uyararak, arzunuzdan vazge\u00e7irecek bin bir sebep yaratm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r&#8230; korku ve endi\u015fe tohumlar\u0131n\u0131 sisteminizin her bir k\u00f6\u015fesine da\u011f\u0131tm\u0131\u015ft\u0131r&#8230; ve  bir ka\u00e7 tutum ve davran\u0131\u015f aras\u0131nda gidip gelmi\u015finizdir. Mesela, (1) karar\u0131 ertelemi\u015f, zihinsel sava\u015f\u0131 uzatm\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131zd\u0131r; (2) olaydan vazge\u00e7ip, yerinizde kalmay\u0131 se\u00e7mi\u015finizdir; (3) \u201cseni dinlemeyece\u011fim\u201d deyip kafan\u0131z\u0131n dikine gitmi\u015finizdir; veya (4) kar\u015f\u0131t arg\u00fcmanlar \u00fcretip harekete ge\u00e7mi\u015finizdir&#8230; Ama bir yandan da, t\u00fcm bunlar olup biterken, i\u00e7inizde bir \u015f\u00fcphe, endi\u015fe, ve bir \u015feyleri ka\u00e7\u0131rma duygusuyla kar\u0131\u015f\u0131k \u201chayat ak\u0131p ge\u00e7ip gidiyor&#8230; nereye kadar b\u00f6yle devam edebilir&#8230;\u201d d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcncesiyle i\u00e7inizdeki sava\u015f\u0131 s\u00fcrd\u00fcrm\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fczd\u00fcr. Bunlar\u0131n hepsi, karar alma a\u00e7\u0131s\u0131ndan \u00e7ok iyi g\u00fczel de, as\u0131l mesele, ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z kararla b\u00fct\u00fcn olup olmay\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u0131z&#8230; Karar alsak da karars\u0131zl\u0131k halen i\u00e7imizde bir kurt gibi bizi kemiriyorsa bir yerlerde yanl\u0131\u015f\u0131m\u0131z var demektir. <\/p>\n<p>Ooooofff ooofff&#8230;. ne korkun\u00e7 bir his&#8230; de\u011fil mi? S\u0131k\u0131\u015fm\u0131\u015fl\u0131\u011f\u0131n ba\u015fka bir formda tezah\u00fcr edi\u015fi&#8230; Bir se\u00e7im yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131zda, di\u011fer se\u00e7enekleri ard\u0131m\u0131zda b\u0131rakamama s\u0131k\u0131nt\u0131s\u0131&#8230; Adeta ayn\u0131 anda iki yerde olma iste\u011fi&#8230; Veya \u201cekme\u011fi hem yiyim, hem de b\u00fct\u00fcn kals\u0131n\u201d refleksi&#8230; Ne ayn\u0131 anda iki yerde olabiliriz, ne de yedi\u011fimiz ekmek bizi hem doyuracak, hem de b\u00fct\u00fcn kalacak! Kabul ediyorum; istemesek de kendimizi k\u0131s\u0131tlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z bir d\u00f6nemden ge\u00e7iyoruz&#8230; Neyin do\u011fru, neyin yanl\u0131\u015f oldu\u011funu bilmedi\u011fimiz; neyin hay\u0131rl\u0131, neyin sak\u0131ncal\u0131 olabilece\u011fini kestiremedi\u011fimiz; hatta, neyin risk almaya de\u011fer, neyinse vazge\u00e7ilesi oldu\u011funa dair emin olamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z ikilemlerle dolu bir d\u00f6nem&#8230; O y\u00fczden de, karars\u0131zl\u0131k i\u00e7inde olmak \u00e7ok normal!<\/p>\n<p>Tamam normal da&#8230; nas\u0131l ve nereye kadar, b\u00f6ylesi bir karars\u0131zl\u0131k ve ikilemde ya\u015fayabiliriz ki? Bu olma halinde ya\u015famak hi\u00e7 de sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 de\u011fil. Bundan ar\u0131nman\u0131n bir yolu olmal\u0131! Bir \u015fekilde zihnin, bilin\u00e7 ve fark\u0131ndal\u0131kla durumu ele al\u0131p, en iyi \u015fekilde y\u00f6netmesine olanak sa\u011flamal\u0131y\u0131z; ve duygu-beden-zihin dengesini yakalamal\u0131y\u0131z&#8230; Peki ya nas\u0131l? Ge\u00e7mi\u015fte \u00e7ok\u00e7a ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131m ve tan\u0131d\u0131\u011f\u0131m bir duygu oldu\u011fundan olsa gerek, karars\u0131zl\u0131k ile kararl\u0131l\u0131k aras\u0131ndaki ince \u00e7izgiyi \u00e7ok net g\u00f6r\u00fcr oldum. Ald\u0131\u011f\u0131m kararlarla b\u00fct\u00fcn olamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m ve di\u011fer se\u00e7enekleri ard\u0131mda b\u0131rakamad\u0131\u011f\u0131m zamanlarda, durumu duygu-d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnce analizinden ge\u00e7irerek, zihinsel s\u00fcre\u00e7ler devreye sokuyorum. Bu sayede rahatlat\u0131yorum&#8230; Hem karars\u0131zl\u0131k girdab\u0131na kap\u0131lmaktan kendimi korumu\u015f oluyorum, hem de kararlar\u0131mda b\u00fct\u00fcnl\u00fc\u011f\u00fcm\u00fc sa\u011fl\u0131yorum. Demesi kolay&#8230; yapmas\u0131 da kolay&#8230; Hepsi \u015fu basit motto \u00fczerine kurulu:<br \/>\n\u201cDirenme, ak\u0131\u015fta ol&#8230; Z\u0131tla\u015fma, birle\u015f&#8230; Tart\u0131\u015fma, sor ve anla!<\/p>\n<p>1.\tNe istedi\u011fini iyi bil: \u201cGidece\u011fi liman\u0131 bilmeyene hi\u00e7 bir r\u00fczgardan hay\u0131r gelmez\u201d s\u00f6z\u00fcn\u00fc hat\u0131rlay\u0131p, ger\u00e7ekten neyi istedi\u011fini fark\u0131nda ol ve o do\u011frultuda, ona ula\u015fma maksad\u0131yla hareket et.<br \/>\n2.\tRisk-Kazan\u00e7 analizi yap: Ald\u0131\u011f\u0131n riskler kar\u015f\u0131s\u0131nda edinece\u011fin kazan\u00e7, keyif, kay\u0131p veya kederin fark\u0131nda ol. Arzu etti\u011fini ger\u00e7ekle\u015ftirme u\u011fruna nelerden vazge\u00e7meye haz\u0131r oldu\u011funu, ve neler kazanaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131n bilincinde ol.<br \/>\n3.\tOlas\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131n fark\u0131nda ol: Her bir karar\u0131n arkas\u0131nda olas\u0131l\u0131klar\u0131n u\u00e7 noktalarda cereyan etme ihtimali oldu\u011funun fark\u0131nda ol. Ald\u0131\u011f\u0131n riskler ve sonu\u00e7lar istedi\u011fin \u015fekilde gidebildi\u011fi gibi, t\u00fcm\u00fcyle d\u0131\u015f\u0131nda da ger\u00e7ekle\u015febilir. Kendini her t\u00fcr sonuca haz\u0131rla ve teslim et.<br \/>\n4.\tPozitif bak\u0131\u015f\u0131 se\u00e7: \u0130\u015fler ters gidebildi\u011fi gibi, harika da gidebilir. \u00c7ekim Yasas\u0131n\u0131 esas al\u0131p, ayd\u0131nl\u0131k ve olumlu senaryoya odaklan; tercih etti\u011fini hayat\u0131na ta\u015f\u0131.<br \/>\n5.\tYeni k\u00f6ye yeni adet getir: Yeni normali eski al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar\u0131nla ya\u015fama \u00e7abas\u0131ndan vazge\u00e7. Yeni al\u0131\u015fkanl\u0131klar edinmeye a\u00e7\u0131k ol. Ya\u015fad\u0131\u011f\u0131n d\u00f6nemin ge\u00e7mi\u015f y\u0131llardan farkl\u0131 oldu\u011funu, ve yapt\u0131klar\u0131n ile yapacaklar\u0131n\u0131n da farkl\u0131la\u015faca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 kabul et; beklentilerini de o y\u00f6nde kurgulayarak harekete ge\u00e7.<br \/>\n6.\tAdaptif ol: Karar\u0131na ba\u011fl\u0131 ol, ama ba\u011f\u0131ml\u0131 olma. Karar\u0131n\u0131n arkas\u0131nda dururken, \u015fartlar\u0131n de\u011fi\u015febilece\u011fini hat\u0131rlay\u0131p, bukalemun gibi durumla beraber de\u011fi\u015fime ayak uydur.<br \/>\n7.\tBasit ya\u015fa: Hayat k\u0131sa; keder, dert ve tasalanmayla ge\u00e7irmek i\u00e7in fazlas\u0131yla k\u0131sa. Ayn\u0131 konu etraf\u0131nda fazla kafa ve enerjini vermek yerine, basit d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn; k\u0131sa d\u00f6nemli kararlar al. Bir yanl\u0131\u015f varsa, konu yeniden kar\u015f\u0131na \u00e7\u0131kacak ve yeni analiz ve de\u011ferlendirmeye a\u00e7\u0131lacakt\u0131r.<br \/>\n\u00d6zetle, karars\u0131zl\u0131k bizi mahvetmeden, \u201cen k\u00f6t\u00fc karar karars\u0131zl\u0131ktan iyidir\u201d felsefesiyle yola devam&#8230; <\/p>\n<p>29 Temmuz 2020<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>(Yazar\u0131 sesli dinlemek i\u00e7in t\u0131klay\u0131n.) Ge\u00e7en yaz\u0131mda, \u0130stanbul\u2019a u\u00e7ma konusundaki kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z\u0131n dayan\u0131lmaz \u201chafifli\u011fini\u201d kaleme alm\u0131\u015ft\u0131m. Her ne olursa olsun, er ya da ge\u00e7 u\u00e7may\u0131 kafaya koyu\u015fumuzun hikayesiydi. \u015eansl\u0131yd\u0131k&#8230; kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131n ve niyet etmenin m\u00fcthi\u015f itici g\u00fcc\u00fcn\u00fc arkam\u0131za alarak yol ald\u0131k&#8230; Bir yandan, belirsizlik i\u00e7inde yerimizde sayd\u0131k; di\u011fer yandan, kararl\u0131l\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z sayesinde \u015fartlar lehimize i\u015fledi ve sa\u011f salim [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":4794,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[114],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4790","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-yazilar"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4790","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=4790"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4790\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4793,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4790\/revisions\/4793"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4794"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=4790"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=4790"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mindthepositive.com\/tr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=4790"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}